Here Are Things Parents Say That Demotivate Kids To Learn

ur parents and teachers told us certain things while we were growing up, and some of them may have discouraged us from being lifelong learners.

I remember a teacher told us in 7th grade that you girls come from rich families, you have no interest in education and you girls can only be English-speaking convent mothers. It was very demotivating and discouraged us to learn more.

It shaped our mindset toward learning, and this is why it’s important to challenge these beliefs.

Here are some things parents and teachers might have said that can be barriers to learning:

“If you don’t get a degree, you won’t have any success.”

While a college degree can be an important factor in securing employment, it is not the only path to success and there are many successful individuals who have had great careers without one.

“Don’t waste your time learning new things. You need to get a job right now.”

This sends a clear message that learning new skills and knowledge is not important, when in fact it can open up many opportunities for growth.

"You're not smart enough to do that."

This statement can make a person feel like they are not capable of learning new things, which can discourage them from trying.

"Why do you need to learn that? It's not important."

This type of comment can make a person feel like their interests and curiosity are not valued, which can discourage them from pursuing their passions and learning more about the world.

"You're wasting your time with that."

This type of statement can make a person feel like their efforts to learn something new are not worthwhile, which can discourage them from continuing to learn and grow.

You are too dumb to understand this.

This type of comment can make a person feel like they are not capable of learning something new and complex, which can discourage them from trying to understand it.

Learn because the teachers told you to, and don't use your own brain

This type of statement can discourage a person from taking ownership of their learning and exploring topics that interest them. It also sends the message that critical thinking and problem-solving skills are not valued.

Focus on academics. Art, and sports will not fetch you money

This type of statement can make a person feel like their interests and talents are not valued, which can discourage them from pursuing their passions. It also sends the message that learning should be focused solely on topics that are deemed to be 'useful'.

"You should focus on getting good grades instead of learning for the sake of learning."

This type of comment can make a person feel like their only goal should be to achieve good grades, rather than pursuing knowledge and understanding for its own sake.

"You're too old to learn that now."

This type of statement can make a person feel like it's too late to learn something new, which can discourage them from pursuing new skills and knowledge throughout their lives.

"You need to focus on a stable job."

This type of statement can make a person feel like their passion is not valued, and that they should prioritize stability over pursuing their interests and passions.

"You're not talented enough to make a career out of that."

This type of comment can make a person feel like they are not good enough to pursue their passion professionally, which can discourage them from even trying.

"You need to study something more practical."

This type of statement can make a person feel like their passion is not practical or valuable, which can discourage them from pursuing it further.

Learning is supposed to be a joyful experience, and we should never discourage people from exploring their interests and passions. It is important to be supportive of those who are trying to make the most out of their lives by learning new things and developing their skills. We should all strive to create an environment where everyone feels empowered to learn and grow, no matter what their age or background is.

Its ok for parents to not know about different career opportunities but  they should make effort to learn  and understand more, in order to be able to support their children in making informed choices about their future. They should also let their children explore different options without being judgemental or discouraging them from following their dreams.

 Things your parents and teachers told you that were biased from their own life experience 

"I had to work hard and sacrifice a lot to get where I am today, and you should do the same."

This type of comment can be biased because it assumes that the same approach that worked for the person will work for their child or student, and may not take into account different individual circumstances and life experiences.

"I regret not pursuing a different career, so you should avoid making the same mistake."

This type of statement can be biased because it assumes that the person's own experience is universal and applies to everyone, regardless of their own passions and interests.

"You should follow in my footsteps and pursue the same career that I did."

This type of comment can be biased because it assumes that the person's own career path is the best and only option for their child or student, and may not take into account their unique talents, passions, and interests.

"You should study a certain subject because it will lead to a stable and successful career."

This type of statement can be biased because it assumes that the person's own definition of success and stability applies to everyone, and may not take into account different individual goals and aspirations.

"I never had the opportunity to pursue my dreams, so you should be grateful for the opportunities you have."

This type of comment can be biased because it assumes that the person's own experiences and limitations apply to their child or student, and may not take into account different individual circumstances and life experiences.

"We know better because we have seen more life," which can discourage them from being lifelong learners.

This statement can make the child or student feel like their experiences and perspectives are not valued or important, which can lead to a lack of motivation to learn and explore new ideas.

"If I had the opportunity like you, I would have done a lot better,"

It's not fair to say this to kids, it kills their motivation and enthusiasm to learn, just because they don't have the same opportunities that you did. 

"You won't understand the life struggles we had because you have technology at your hand.

This statement can make the individual feel like their life experiences are not valued or taken into consideration.

If your parenting happened in a certain way, under certain circumstances, that may not be the best way to parent your child. We need to learn from those incidents and adapt accordingly to ensure that our parenting style is up to date with the current scenario.

This type of comment can lead to a person feeling like they need to live up to someone else's expectations, rather than their own, which can be discouraging and stifle creativity.

Kids deserve love and support from their parents, not criticism and comparison. We should encourage our children to be the best versions of themselves, and allow them to pursue their passions without judgment.

By creating an atmosphere of acceptance instead of criticism, we can help our kids develop a positive attitude toward learning and life. This will provide them with the motivation they need to reach their full potential.

In conclusion, it is important to be aware of the potential biases in our language and behavior when speaking to or teaching children and young adults. We should avoid making assumptions or comparisons that could discourage them from pursuing their passions.

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